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Chopra’s Fools

Felix Dennis
August 15, 2006
Mandalay, Mustique
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Here we are, then— one on one,
Seeking wisdom on the run,
Gnostic bandits, snared by truth,
Certain of eternal youth,

Prada skivers, Chopra’s fools,
Subject to no law or rules,
Gilt-edged assets, free of fault,
Banked in a Geneva vault.

Welcome suckers, quelle surprise!
Karma Cola, guilt-free lies,
Blind belief shall set you free,
Proofs of immortality

Are all around you— pony up!
Share with us the loving cup,
Ancient wisdom’s hoarded truth
Offers you— eternal youth.

All my life I have hated and despised charlatans and mountebanks. Not for the loot they extract from fools — which, after all, is nothing more than their natural inheritance — but for the cynicism their lies sow wherever they practice.  Deepak Chopra is such a one. The cult of Scientology is another.  Television evangelists represent little more than a snake pit of them.  In the course of recorded history, their names alone would fill the database capacity of a main-frame computer.  I repeat that I do not in any way begrudge them the money they extort from deluded idiots: only the harvest of bitterness their cant and hypocrisy deposits in its wake.