Sex

Better Than Sex!

Felix Dennis
July 19, 2001
Mandalay, Mustique
Unpublished
Arrow
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Though quacks claim physical exercise
Will assist the spine to flex,
And build to-die-for pecs,
Or transform utter wrecks;
Still it’s never, never, never, never,
Never, never, ever, ever,
Never ever better than sex!
I’ve seen the surprise in a doxy’s eyes
When the filthy rich write cheques,
Stuff caviar down their necks,
Or buy them a gold Rolex;
But it’s never, never, never, never,
Never, never, ever, ever,
Never ever better than sex!
‘Let’s still be friends’ is a tip to the wise
That it’s time to clear the decks,
To collect all your effects,
To pay your last respects
And telephone up your ex’;
It’ll never, never, never, never,
Never, never, ever, ever,
Never be better than sex!